What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons. Civil Engineers build targets. *****************************************

Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit." *****************************************

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice As big as it needs to be. *****************************************

Engineers think that equations approximate the real world. Scientists think that the real world approximates equations. Mathematicians are unable to make the connection... *****************************************

You may be an engineer... If the salespeople at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions. *****************************************